Excuse me while I get super personal on you. I just don't know how to share this project, which I love, without being honest with you about where it came from. So let's get fucking real, shall we?

Matthew and I almost lost each other this winter. We went to the very edge of our relationship and of our sanities. We crashed, burned, drowned, exploded, imploded, choked, bled, freaked out, lay comatose, and all but died. But on January 30th we decided that we were gonna fight like hell for each other, and we did: we fought like hell, we fought in hell, we fought hell itself. On our 11th anniversary, which happened in the middle of all the hellish fighting, I built him/us a present on our living room wall - a calendar of sorts.

I strung one very long piece of rope along the top of the wall and hung other ropes off of it: white cotton, hemp, black and white baker's twine, white and gold wrapping twine, all various thicknesses and lengths. Then I tied a knot in one of the ropes and wrote him a letter inviting him to tie a knot with me at the end of every day to say and to symbolize that on that day we had had each other in our hearts fully.

I wrote him.

I wrote him.

Each knot

Each knot

and every day

and every day

He wrote me.

He wrote me.

is a day well spent

is a day well spent

I love him more.

I love him more.

It's become a really lovely way to end the day: simple, sweet, and totally present with each other. And of course with every day that passes the rope calendar changes shape, which I like very much. We are watching our commitment to each other grow in an external, physical, and visual way. It's gratifying to watch it become more knotted, encouraging to have a ritual at the end of the day that makes me excited for the next, and inspiring to think of how many more knots we're going to tie in our life time.

Speaking of which, we're going to tie the big one very soon. Wha?!

Posted
AuthorSarah Reid